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Loving Across Borders: Our First Two Months as a Long Distance Married Couple

 

If someone had told me that right after saying "I do," I would be living thousands of kilometers away from my husband, I probably wouldn’t have believed it. But as we all know, life moves in the most unexpected ways.

For Khairu and me, our first week as a married couple was also our last week together for a long time. Right after our akad nikah (wedding solemnization), we had to go our separate ways for work. Khairu flew to Myanmar, and I stayed right here in Palembang. That's how our long-distance marriage began.

The Reality Check: Tears and the First Farewell

The moment he left, the reality hit me—hard. Being a wife who lives far away from her husband is not easy at all.

The first week was the absolute hardest. It was filled with tears, a mind that couldn’t focus, and emotions that came rushing whenever I saw something that reminded me of our short but beautiful moments together. Everything felt overwhelming, as if my heart was still trying to understand how quickly everything had happened.

But despite the sadness, we always reminded ourselves of one crucial truth: This is our decision, our journey, and we choose to make it work.

🔗 Building Anchors: Our Long-Distance Routines

Slowly, after that tough first week, we began to build routines that made the distance feel lighter. These simple routines became our anchors—the proof that even when we are far apart, we are still growing together as husband and wife.

  • Daily Check-ins: We text each other throughout the day, updating even the smallest things so we still feel like we’re living life side by side.

  • Morning and Evening Calls: We have our essential morning call before work and another call in the afternoon, which somehow makes the day feel complete.

  • Team Decisions: We discuss budgeting, make decisions, and plan for our future as a team, just like any other couple.

  • Spiritual Connection: We even recite Qur’an together.

All these acts, done consistently across thousands of miles, show us that a marriage is strong not based on proximity, but on intention.

❤️ Choosing Patience: Navigating Emotional Distance

Of course, being in a long-distance marriage also comes with its emotional challenges. There are days, especially during my sensitive cycles, when I become more emotional and overwhelmed. It makes my husband feel worried and confused because he can’t physically be here to comfort me.

But this is where his character truly shines.

He always chooses patience. He chooses gentleness. He chooses to calm me instead of questioning or dismissing my feelings.

And for that, I am forever grateful. Thank you, my husband, my perfect man, for never making me feel kekurangan (lacking), for always being patient with me, even when I act like a little child. Thank you for loving me consistently, even from far away.

I love you so much, all the way to Jannah, InshaAllah.

A Marriage Built on Choice

These first two months of Long Distance Married life have taught us a lot. The longing is real, the loneliness comes unexpectedly, and the challenges can be tiring.

But through it all, we keep choosing trust and honesty.

Distance can certainly create doubts, but it can also forge incredible strength if we allow it. And we choose to let it strengthen us. Even though we are far apart, we are building a marriage that is strong not because everything is easy, but because we choose each other every single day.

That is the beauty of this unexpected journey—loving, growing, and holding on, even across borders.

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